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Friday, August 9, 2019

Hungerford (2014)




I’ve been on a roll with British and found footage movies lately. I kept finding one after the other that I really enjoyed. But all good things must come to an end and that end was Hungerford. Yeah this is going to be one of “those” reviews.

Cowen is in college, though what sort of college I couldn’t tell you. He has been assigned a lesson where he has to document a week in his life. So that explains the camera… He has some shitty roommates that seem to drink, party, and generally be annoying all of the time. One night there is a storm and a huge explosion, so they decide to drink and party. The next day people start to act strange, but they don’t notice because they suck as human beings and just want to drink and party. They go to a… wait for it… party hosted by Cowen’s ex-girlfriend who wants to get back with him. They talk relationship stuff while people continue to act freaky. Again, they don’t notice because they suck. A girl starts spewing up blood and having a seizure and they blame Cowen’s friend for spiking her drink… They are all super pissed when they get kicked out of the party.

I could go on, but I won’t. Basically, England is being invaded by aliens that look like rubber crickets. They attach themselves to the back of people’s necks turning them into indestructible killing machines. Well actually if you spray them with underarm deodorant it forces them off the people and sometimes melts them. The rules aren’t very clear. This is one of many ways this movie makes no sense. Sometimes the Alien controlled humans kill people and sometimes they don’t. The movie tries to explain that if you fight back, they kill you, but when our characters fight back they only get captured. What the hell movie?

This is how I felt after watching this garbage!
Another bit of stupidity has them thinking they killed the postman because he went nuts. This is before they notice that their town is being wiped out by Aliens. Because one of them is on probation they roll the body up in a carpet and hide it in the dumpster out back. Of course, they make a point to film the whole thing. I guess Cowen is really dedicated to doing his assignment correctly. Ladies and Gentlemen these are the “heroes” of our story. I could go on about the story and characters, but I don’t feel like it. Please trust me when I say that these are just a couple examples of what you are in store for if you decide to watch Hungerford.

What else should I mention? Extreme nausea inducing shaky camerawork as expected from the very worst of found footage movies. Terrible CGI effects work when we do get to see anything at all. Though I do have to say the rubber props for the Alien grasshoppers was fun. That might be the only good thing about this turkey. Fake digital “breaking” up at the perfect time to hide the effects work that they meager budget couldn’t afford and the old favorite of blood on the lens that never looks close to real. Seriously guys just toss something on the cover of your GoPro… it will come off.

This movie is awful, and no one should watch it. I already threw myself on that grenade for you so make my sacrifice worth it and watch something else. Movies like this are why I hate found footage flicks.


© Copyright 2019 John Shatzer

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