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I've been threatening to do this for a while now and I suppose it is time. Despite me swearing that I'd never force myself to sit th...

Wednesday, June 15, 2022

Bloodmoon (1990)

This slasher flick is totally new to me. That is surprising because after years of digging thru the shelves of various video stores I’ve seen most of them. Toss in the fact that this is an Australian production and I’m very excited to check it out. Let’s not waste any more time.

The movie opens with a crucifix hanging in the woods with blood slowly dripping down it. Okay that is a good way to kick things off. Then we get a bit of catholic girls in choir followed by a shower/locker room scene with lots of nudity. Damn movie you get the formula! One of the girls dries off and goes looking for her boyfriend, who is the source of the blood on the crucifix. She gets chased and eliminated by the killer with a barbed wire garrote. The killer even buries the bodies to keep them hidden.

Sadly, after that awesome start we get an extended bit with the townies and locals hating each other. There are fights, pranks, and shenanigans that have nothing to do with the killings or what should be the main plot. Hell, the locals don’t even figure into the murders at all and as some point sort of disappear never to be seen again. Well, there is one of them who likes one of the schoolgirls who is important later. But for the most part I don’t get why they spent so much time on the rivalry.

After seeing some more deaths, the identity of the killer is revealed, way too early, and then the rest of the movie is him trying to draw our main female lead, Mary, into a trap so she can be killed. I won’t spoil who the killer is here, though it is kind of obvious. There is some running around the woods, an unexpected hero, and some marriage counseling with a shotgun before the end credits roll.

I’m disappointed with Bloodmoon. It started out with a bang but then quickly spent most of the middle of the movie bouncing between teen angst and sophomoric humor. We get a couple of kills sprinkled in, but it drags a lot. When they finally do get back to the killings the movie does get better, but then they spoil who the killer is in a really dumb way. Toss in some generic characters with the meandering story that takes up the hour and forty-minute runtime for a terribly way to kill a couple of hours.

The kills are plentiful but not memorable. We get a girl choked out with barbed wire that cuts away when things get good. A stabbing in a phonebooth that is okay, another stabbing off camera with blood splashing on the window that disappoints. Really the best kill in the movie is a head getting smashed repeatedly on a table and even that switches to an obvious dummy at some point. The best effect isn’t a kill but is a bottle of acid to the face. I read that the filmmakers had to make some cuts to tone things down on initial release, but I can only judge what is left.

Bloodmoon had potential but then failed to deliver. If you are a hard-core slasher completest that needs to see everything then sure track this one down and watch it. But for most fans who just want to scratch that teenage body count itch there are way better options. Personally, I never need to watch it again.

 

© Copyright 2022 John Shatzer

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